The Wait Continues...(But, it's really OK!)

Happy Spring!

We wanted to pop in to say we may not be posting again for quite a while and here's why...

We spoke to our adoption agency yesterday to review our adoption "preferences" and make a few little updates.  During that call, we flat out asked how much longer they anticipate that we will be waiting if they HAD to guess.  We wanted to know because our friends and family often ask and the truth is, we don't know.  And, quite honestly, when it happens is not as big of a deal to us as I think people sometimes think it is.  The truth is since we've been married over 20 years and have been thinking about adoption for almost 10 years, therefore a couple more years just doesn't seem like that big of a deal.  More importantly, despite the wait and all that goes into adoption, we believe that God led us here and will see it through in His timing. 

For those of you wondering, the expected wait time is another 1 1/2 to 2 years.  There are two main reasons for this.  #1- we are gender specific since we are requesting to adopt a girl which means our profile book get's shown a lot less since they would have to have birth moms who already know if they are having a girl. #2- A lot of birth moms want to be involved in naming the child the first name.  As you all know, we've been praying for Abigail by name for years.  If we did decide to change this decision, it would have to be a "God thing."  At this point, we are not ready to make that change.  However, we are in prayer about it.  Despite all of this, there is always a chance that a birth mom could see our profile book next month and choose us.  Or the adoption agency could get a cold call from a birth mom and we may be called if we are a fit. There are just so many variables that go into it all.

One thing that we will have to do early next year is an update.  This involves doing a lot of paperwork again including medical forms, background checks, etc.  We are not super excited about that but we'll do what we have to.  After that, we will be good for another 3 years so that should certainly be the last major update we'd have to complete.  So, if everything is quiet over here, just know that it's because we are patiently waiting for God to work it all out when the time is right.  In the meantime, we'll be working to grow closer to Him so we can become more of what He wants us to be in order to make us better as a couple and better prepared to be parents. 

And, maybe I'll even finish that degree I'm working on before Abigail comes along...

Love!
H & B

Activity!

Hi Friends!

We hope you are all doing well and getting ready for a beautiful spring!  We haven't been posting lately because there hasn't been anything to report but... we do have a little news about some "activity" on the adoption front!  It might not seem like much but when you've been thinking about adoption for many years and you're in the waiting stage, any news is pretty exciting! We found out today that our profile book was shown for the FIRST time in February twice-FINALLY! Yay!!  And, we were one birth mom's third choice.  Although this did not result in us being selected at this time, it's so encouraging to see that we have been a "waiting family" long enough that we are now in the position where our book will be shown more often.  If it wasn't for all of you who have and continue to support us, we wouldn't even be at this stage. Please continue to pray with us! Pray for Abigail and her birth parents and please pray that God will continue to prepare us for the exciting adventure of parenthood in His perfect timing!

Thank you all! We love you!

Heather & Benson

PS. Want to buy some delicious coffee and help us raise money for adoption at the same time?  Click on the "coffee fundraiser" link at the top right :)

We're Active again!

We found out late yesterday that our home-study update (due to moving) has been approved and we are once again an "active waiting family."  Yay! 


So, what now?!  Well, we wait...  and, we read books and we look for a pediatrician AND we pray...A LOT!  We pray that God continues to guide us through this journey.  We pray that Abigail will be healthy and that her birth mom is taking care of herself.  We pray that we will be good parents and that we will use this time to prepare well- in our hearts and practically. 


And, honestly, we pray that we get a placement by January of 2017 because if we do not, we will have to do a major home study update and that involves more paperwork and more money.  We already had to do an update fee due to the move so we're hoping to avoid more fees.  We know God is in control of when and how everything happens BUT (in our humanness) we'd LOVE a placement by the beginning of 2017.


So, that's it for now and there will likely not be much to report for a while.  We may not have anything to blog about until we have a placement-exciting!! In the meantime, please keep us in your prayers.  Also, if you'd like to purchase some coffee or make a small donation to help us with the extra home-study update expense and remaining we have to raise, it would be more appreciated than you know.  Any donations of $50 or more will automatically receive a tax-deductible receipt if made through the Lifesong link at upper right hand side of blog.  If we receive any additional donations, I will be sure to update the thermometer so it's accurate.


Thanks again- Love you guys!!!

Just a little update...

OK, so it has been FOREVER since we've posted but you haven't missed much :)  However, we love all of you that support and follow this LONG journey with us so we wanted to give you "just a little update."

So, a month ago we moved.  Oh, the joy of moving!  It was an unexpected but necessary move.  Honestly, it was kind of stressful and we're glad it's done. Since we had already completed our home study visit in our last home, we had to go on hold status until the social worker can come out to our new home and complete a new home study visit .  We have that scheduled next week! Once that visit and some paperwork we had to redo is approved, we're once again an "active waiting family."

I already asked our social worker when she thinks our profile book will start being shown and she said once our new home visit is approved, she would expect us to start getting some activity due to the amount of time we have already been categorized as a "waiting family."  We've been considered a waiting family for a little over a year and the average wait it typically at least 2 years so it's not unusual that we're still waiting.  And, the move has slowed everything down by a few months.

So, that's our little update for now...

For what it's worth, I've had this time next year on my mind...we'll see.  I'll update again to let everyone know when we are once again officially active. Hopefully, the new home study approval will happen quickly :)

April stats, dresses & tutus...oh my!

Hi Friends!

Happy Mother's Day!

We just wanted to share a quick status update & show you some cuteness that I can hardly stand!

So, everything is quiet on our end.  As you probably know, we're been on the active waiting family list for about 3 1/2 months.  At some point (next month or next year...only God knows) we will get a call that a birth mom wants to meet us.  Until then, here's some updates.

2015 April Update 

So, here's what has happened so far this year with placements... 

7 total infants placed...

•        Race:

o   4 are Caucasian

o   3 are multiracial

•        Gender:

o   4 are female

o   3 are male  

•        Special Needs:

o   4 kiddos have special needs

 

On another note, we were blessed this week with an abundance of the most adorable fancy dresses and tutus a little girl (and mom!) could hope for!  Check these out!  Talk about cuteness overload.  Abigail is sure to be the best dressed girl on the block- or maybe in the city :)  (Thank you Karen!  You have blessed us once again!)

 

(Click to Enlarge)

 

March Stats

Hi Friends!

I know it's been a while since I've posted so I just wanted to let everyone know we're still here :)  We're patiently waiting until we get a phone call....it may be next month or next year.  Thank you for your continued prayer!

As always, thank you for your amazing support!!

Here are the most recent stats from our agency...

2014 Agency Stats

We just wanted to share some quick stats we received from our adoption agency.  As you can see below, the wait in 2014 was anywhere from 90 days (completely open in preferences) to almost 4 years (very limited in preferences).  If I had to guess, I would say that we are around the middle of this range since we are specific that we want to adopt a girl but we are pretty open on other aspects. But, stats change all the time and are not the only factor.  If the expectant parent(s) that see our book connect with us that is really all that matters. However, we can say with true conviction that we are OK with whatever the wait because we know that God has the child for us in His perfect timing. And, we're closer than we've ever been! I still thought this was worth sharing just the same :)

2014 In Review

“A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling.  God sets the lonely in families, he leads the prisoners out with singing.”

— Psalm 68:5-6 (NIV)

Domestic Adoption Quick Facts

2014 DOMESTIC TRENDS ü  Increase of expectant parents desiring to build more open relationships with adoptive parents. ü  Increase of expectant parents desiring to incorporate names. ü  Increase in birthfather  involvement.

118 EXPECTANT PARENTS SERVED 41 CHILDREN IN FOREVER FAMILIES   18 Males                        31- 0 mo.            1- 2 yr.      23 Females                      6- 1 mo.            1- 3 yr.                                             2- 1 yr.                                                                                             16 Caucasian                    9 African American     1 Asian                               3 Hispanic     12 Multi-Racial                                                                                               Average Family Wait Time: 560 days Longest Wait: 1,373 days (limited preferences)    Shortest Wait: 90 days (completely open)