The Wait Continues...(But, it's really OK!)

Happy Spring!

We wanted to pop in to say we may not be posting again for quite a while and here's why...

We spoke to our adoption agency yesterday to review our adoption "preferences" and make a few little updates.  During that call, we flat out asked how much longer they anticipate that we will be waiting if they HAD to guess.  We wanted to know because our friends and family often ask and the truth is, we don't know.  And, quite honestly, when it happens is not as big of a deal to us as I think people sometimes think it is.  The truth is since we've been married over 20 years and have been thinking about adoption for almost 10 years, therefore a couple more years just doesn't seem like that big of a deal.  More importantly, despite the wait and all that goes into adoption, we believe that God led us here and will see it through in His timing. 

For those of you wondering, the expected wait time is another 1 1/2 to 2 years.  There are two main reasons for this.  #1- we are gender specific since we are requesting to adopt a girl which means our profile book get's shown a lot less since they would have to have birth moms who already know if they are having a girl. #2- A lot of birth moms want to be involved in naming the child the first name.  As you all know, we've been praying for Abigail by name for years.  If we did decide to change this decision, it would have to be a "God thing."  At this point, we are not ready to make that change.  However, we are in prayer about it.  Despite all of this, there is always a chance that a birth mom could see our profile book next month and choose us.  Or the adoption agency could get a cold call from a birth mom and we may be called if we are a fit. There are just so many variables that go into it all.

One thing that we will have to do early next year is an update.  This involves doing a lot of paperwork again including medical forms, background checks, etc.  We are not super excited about that but we'll do what we have to.  After that, we will be good for another 3 years so that should certainly be the last major update we'd have to complete.  So, if everything is quiet over here, just know that it's because we are patiently waiting for God to work it all out when the time is right.  In the meantime, we'll be working to grow closer to Him so we can become more of what He wants us to be in order to make us better as a couple and better prepared to be parents. 

And, maybe I'll even finish that degree I'm working on before Abigail comes along...

Love!
H & B

Activity!

Hi Friends!

We hope you are all doing well and getting ready for a beautiful spring!  We haven't been posting lately because there hasn't been anything to report but... we do have a little news about some "activity" on the adoption front!  It might not seem like much but when you've been thinking about adoption for many years and you're in the waiting stage, any news is pretty exciting! We found out today that our profile book was shown for the FIRST time in February twice-FINALLY! Yay!!  And, we were one birth mom's third choice.  Although this did not result in us being selected at this time, it's so encouraging to see that we have been a "waiting family" long enough that we are now in the position where our book will be shown more often.  If it wasn't for all of you who have and continue to support us, we wouldn't even be at this stage. Please continue to pray with us! Pray for Abigail and her birth parents and please pray that God will continue to prepare us for the exciting adventure of parenthood in His perfect timing!

Thank you all! We love you!

Heather & Benson

PS. Want to buy some delicious coffee and help us raise money for adoption at the same time?  Click on the "coffee fundraiser" link at the top right :)

We're Active again!

We found out late yesterday that our home-study update (due to moving) has been approved and we are once again an "active waiting family."  Yay! 


So, what now?!  Well, we wait...  and, we read books and we look for a pediatrician AND we pray...A LOT!  We pray that God continues to guide us through this journey.  We pray that Abigail will be healthy and that her birth mom is taking care of herself.  We pray that we will be good parents and that we will use this time to prepare well- in our hearts and practically. 


And, honestly, we pray that we get a placement by January of 2017 because if we do not, we will have to do a major home study update and that involves more paperwork and more money.  We already had to do an update fee due to the move so we're hoping to avoid more fees.  We know God is in control of when and how everything happens BUT (in our humanness) we'd LOVE a placement by the beginning of 2017.


So, that's it for now and there will likely not be much to report for a while.  We may not have anything to blog about until we have a placement-exciting!! In the meantime, please keep us in your prayers.  Also, if you'd like to purchase some coffee or make a small donation to help us with the extra home-study update expense and remaining we have to raise, it would be more appreciated than you know.  Any donations of $50 or more will automatically receive a tax-deductible receipt if made through the Lifesong link at upper right hand side of blog.  If we receive any additional donations, I will be sure to update the thermometer so it's accurate.


Thanks again- Love you guys!!!

Just a little update...

OK, so it has been FOREVER since we've posted but you haven't missed much :)  However, we love all of you that support and follow this LONG journey with us so we wanted to give you "just a little update."

So, a month ago we moved.  Oh, the joy of moving!  It was an unexpected but necessary move.  Honestly, it was kind of stressful and we're glad it's done. Since we had already completed our home study visit in our last home, we had to go on hold status until the social worker can come out to our new home and complete a new home study visit .  We have that scheduled next week! Once that visit and some paperwork we had to redo is approved, we're once again an "active waiting family."

I already asked our social worker when she thinks our profile book will start being shown and she said once our new home visit is approved, she would expect us to start getting some activity due to the amount of time we have already been categorized as a "waiting family."  We've been considered a waiting family for a little over a year and the average wait it typically at least 2 years so it's not unusual that we're still waiting.  And, the move has slowed everything down by a few months.

So, that's our little update for now...

For what it's worth, I've had this time next year on my mind...we'll see.  I'll update again to let everyone know when we are once again officially active. Hopefully, the new home study approval will happen quickly :)

April stats, dresses & tutus...oh my!

Hi Friends!

Happy Mother's Day!

We just wanted to share a quick status update & show you some cuteness that I can hardly stand!

So, everything is quiet on our end.  As you probably know, we're been on the active waiting family list for about 3 1/2 months.  At some point (next month or next year...only God knows) we will get a call that a birth mom wants to meet us.  Until then, here's some updates.

2015 April Update 

So, here's what has happened so far this year with placements... 

7 total infants placed...

•        Race:

o   4 are Caucasian

o   3 are multiracial

•        Gender:

o   4 are female

o   3 are male  

•        Special Needs:

o   4 kiddos have special needs

 

On another note, we were blessed this week with an abundance of the most adorable fancy dresses and tutus a little girl (and mom!) could hope for!  Check these out!  Talk about cuteness overload.  Abigail is sure to be the best dressed girl on the block- or maybe in the city :)  (Thank you Karen!  You have blessed us once again!)

 

(Click to Enlarge)

 

March Stats

Hi Friends!

I know it's been a while since I've posted so I just wanted to let everyone know we're still here :)  We're patiently waiting until we get a phone call....it may be next month or next year.  Thank you for your continued prayer!

As always, thank you for your amazing support!!

Here are the most recent stats from our agency...

2014 Agency Stats

We just wanted to share some quick stats we received from our adoption agency.  As you can see below, the wait in 2014 was anywhere from 90 days (completely open in preferences) to almost 4 years (very limited in preferences).  If I had to guess, I would say that we are around the middle of this range since we are specific that we want to adopt a girl but we are pretty open on other aspects. But, stats change all the time and are not the only factor.  If the expectant parent(s) that see our book connect with us that is really all that matters. However, we can say with true conviction that we are OK with whatever the wait because we know that God has the child for us in His perfect timing. And, we're closer than we've ever been! I still thought this was worth sharing just the same :)

2014 In Review

“A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling.  God sets the lonely in families, he leads the prisoners out with singing.”

— Psalm 68:5-6 (NIV)

Domestic Adoption Quick Facts

2014 DOMESTIC TRENDS ü  Increase of expectant parents desiring to build more open relationships with adoptive parents. ü  Increase of expectant parents desiring to incorporate names. ü  Increase in birthfather  involvement.

118 EXPECTANT PARENTS SERVED 41 CHILDREN IN FOREVER FAMILIES   18 Males                        31- 0 mo.            1- 2 yr.      23 Females                      6- 1 mo.            1- 3 yr.                                             2- 1 yr.                                                                                             16 Caucasian                    9 African American     1 Asian                               3 Hispanic     12 Multi-Racial                                                                                               Average Family Wait Time: 560 days Longest Wait: 1,373 days (limited preferences)    Shortest Wait: 90 days (completely open)

  

Profile books delivered to agency!!

Our profile books we're just delivered to our adoption agency today, 1/21! We are official!  Now, the 2 month to 2 year wait starts.  We are patient and excited for it to happen in God's perfect timing :)

Profile book done!!

We finally finished our profile book and wanted to share a few pages from it with you all!  This is part of the book that expectant parents will be shown when choosing an adoptive family for their child.  The hard copy books have been ordered and will arrive to the agency by 1/26 at the latest! At that point, it's just a matter of waiting to be chosen!!

We hope you enjoyed taking a look at it!

And, as always, we are so thankful for the support!  As you can see from the thermometer on the right top side of the page, the additional tax-deductible donations we've received in the last month have put us only $1600 from the $25,000 goal! Thank you!

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas Everyone!  Who knows...this could be our last Christmas without Abigail! We just wanted to thank you all for an amazing year of prayer and support! When we look back to where we were in this process a year ago, it's absolutely amazing how far we've come! We couldn't have done it without you!

For those of you considering an end of year tax-deductible donation, please use the link below. We're so thankful to LifeSong for setting this up for us so there is a tax benefit to those donating! We will be praying for you all this Christmas season! 

Donate: Click Here

Blessings!
Benson and Heather

Last week we had a meeting with our adoption case worker and after reviewing some things including our financial plan, we were given the OK to move forward by preparing our profile book! We are working on that over the next few weeks and it should be available to start being shown in January!  We have been waiting for this for a long time and are very excited!! This means we are now off hold status and are considered a "waiting family".  The average wait time is currently 18 months once the profile book is done but it could be sooner or longer.  We'll see!

We''ll keep busy in the meantime. For one, I was blessed with a scholarship for the Spring 2015 semester to University of Richmond.  Thanks to this, I will start working on my bachelor's degree which I'm super excited about!  We have been abundantly blessed through this whole process and especially financially in the last few weeks. We are grateful!!!

WOW!!! We're practically there!

We're in AWE! The last 2 weeks have been AMAZING as far as fundraising is concerned to the tune of $15,000 raised!! What?!?!?!?!

Not only were we tremendously blessed with confirmation of two grants, we have also received notice of an extremely generous donation from an amazing couple we've never even met in person! I first heard from Karen over a year ago at which time I believe she saw information about our desire to adopt on her daughter's Facebook account. (Hey Jessica! I sure am glad we had that boot camp class together and became Facebook friends :) !!

Karen and I became Facebook friends but have never met in person as she lives in another state. Karen and her husband, Charlie, sent us a lovely card with a kind donation at that time. Now, once again, they have blessed us with an extremely generous donation! We could never fully express our gratitude toward the kindness of a couple that we have never even met in person! Thanks to their generosity and the grants (along with the funds we've been blessed to be able to put in personally, the wonderful dinner theater that was put on for our behalf last year and all the donations that you, our family and friends have blessed us with) we are almost there!

And, check out this timing!  We have our meeting with the adoption agency tomorrow! We've had this meeting scheduled for about 6 months! And, because we can now outline where almost all of the remaining funds are coming from, we can finally move forward!!  Tomorrow we will look over other couple's profile books to get a better idea of how to prepare ours.  Then, we'll start getting ours together and it will soon be available for birth parents to look at and we will be what is known as a "waiting family"! That term might not sound exciting but it's music to our ears!

I know we keep saying it but thank you all so much! We serve an amazing God and He showed up, once again, in this adoption process  in a big way in the last couple weeks! We are so thankful for how he has used each of you to bless us!

CHECK OUT  THE THERMOMETER ON THE RIGHT (at the top of the page)!  YOUR PRAYERS AND SUPPORT  HELPED THIS HAPPEN!

We can't wait until we get to introduce you all to Abigail!

Blessings!
Heather & Benson

So blessed!

We just received word that we are being granted another $5,000! We are speechless!  Check out the thermometer on the right!! We are so blessed!!

Show Hope!!

We are so excited to have received notification yesterday that we have been awarded a $5000 grant from Show Hope!  This put's us more than half way to our financial goal.  Check out the thermometer on the right! This was one of the main grants we were waiting to hear back from. We are so thankful that we were selected for such a generous grant!!

Sporting my "I Love Show Hope" T :)

Please pray with us that we can some how figure out where the remaining funds are coming from, hopefully by our next appointment with the agency in December, so that we can start having our profile book shown! 

Also, if you'd care to donate, we are now set up to take tax-deductible donations!  See below.

Blessings to each and every one of you who take a moment to keep up with our adoption story.  You are all an amazing support system!

Blessings!

Benson & Heather

We are now able to accept tax-deductible donations to Abigail's adoption fund!

We are very thankful that as of today, we are now able to accept tax-deductible donations toward Abigail's adoption fund thanks to Lifesong for Orphans. Some supporters had asked me about this a while ago so we're so excited that this is now an option!

If you would like to make such a donation, here are the details...

Give by Check
Please make checks payable to Lifesong for Orphans.
In the memo please note your gift preference with Family Account Number and Family Name.
(Marshall, 4789)
Please mail checks to:
Lifesong for Orphans
PO Box 40
Gridley, IL 61744
Lifesong has been blessed with a partner that underwrites all US administrative and fund-raising
costs (TMG Foundation and other partners). That means 100% of your donation will go directly to
the need…helping orphans.

Give Online through the bottom below.

Or...
1. Go to www.lifesongfororphans.org/give/donate
2. Select Give to an Adoptive Family
3. Complete online form and fill in Family Account Number (4789) & Family Name (Marshall) Fields
*Please note that PayPal will charge an administrative fee (2.9% + $.30 USD per transaction). Your
donation will be decreased by the amount of this fee.

Individual donations $50 or more and yearly donations totaling $250 or more will receive a tax deductible receipt. Receipts for donations under $50 will gladly be sent upon request.
Lifesong is a 501(c)3 tax exempt organization.

In addition to this exciting news, we were so happy to receive our first grant last week in the amount of $500 from Families Outreach!!



It's adding up and God is providing in His perfect timing.

As always, thank you for your support!!

Sunday, November 2nd is Orphan Sunday!

On November 2nd, Christians around the globe will stand together with one goal: to rouse believers with God's call to care for the orphan and what our role is in response.

Please see below if you're interested in learning about how you can be involved in this amazing ministry!  

On a personal note, if you feel called to help us bring Abigail home, we are still in need of financial assistance. We're waiting to hear back from some grants but still have a long ways to go. Our next meeting with our adoption worker is on Thursday, December 4th. Our hope is that someway, somehow we will be able to define where the remaining funds are coming from at that time so that we can move forward with the process. The thought of being able to have our adoption profile book shown to birth moms in the beginning of the year is very exciting! We still need help to get there and appreciate every prayer and every dollar that comes in. 

(Donate Button on the right or donations can be mailed to Benson & Heather Marshall at 
PO Box 8334 Richmond, VA 23226 
Ref: Abigail's Adoption)

Thank you all!

"Orphan Sunday isn't about charity; it's about the mission of Christ. I pray that every Gospel-transformed congregation will observe Orphan Sunday, calling all Christians to our mandate to image Christ by caring for his little brothers and sisters, the fatherless of the world." -- Dr. Russell Moore, author Adopted for Life

Does your family, small group or church have plans for Orphan Sunday? There are so many ways that we can honor orphans collectively as the Body of Christ on Orphan Sunday. If you don't have plans or haven't heard of an event near you, here are 4 ways you can engage in this year's Orphan Sunday:

1. Advent for Orphans Calendar -- see explanation below.
2. Orphan's Table -- share a meal eaten by orphans around the world. Gather with family, small group or church for the meal, discussion and prayer.
3. Plan an Orphan Sunday event with a Partnership Package -- easy-to- follow Orphan Sunday event plan, enabling you to partner with an organization to create a simple event!
4. Contact your Regional Orphan Sunday Coordinator with questions, to seek ideas as you plan, or to let them know that you will be holding an event.

Be sure to also check out their other resources which include videos, prayer guides, sermon notes, t-shirts & more! Together, let's stand for the orphan!

To learn more about Orphan Sunday or find an event near you visit OrphanSunday.org

Get your FREE Advent Calendar & celebrate with purpose! 

See how your family, small group or church can celebrate the anticipate the birth of our Savior in a special way that also shows love to orphans.

Limited supply of Advent for Orphans calendars available! Learn more & order your calendar today at www.lifesongfororphans.org/advent.

Things are happening!! (aka Paperwork galore!)

So... since the approval of the home-study, I have failed to post an update!  Not because we aren't doing anything but because we have been in  grant application mode!  We've applied to several grants and still have a few to go! Wow- the paperwork for those is each about as much as the home-study (or at least it feels like it) but I'm becoming a pro and they are getting faster!  As you probably know, we still need to raise $17,000 in order for the agency to start showing our profile book.  Our next meeting is scheduled with our case worker in November so our hope is that we will know where the funds are coming from by then so that we can outline our financial plan and start having our profile book shown by the beginning of the year!  I will update the blog for sure as we hear back from grants but for now we're in waiting (& still applying) mode.

We have to give a HUGE thank you to our pastor and friends who are being so kind in writing referral letters as needed for the various grants!

Also, we're excited to be signed up for an adoption baby care class next month from this place below!

So, even though it may not seem that things are going at warp speed, they are going!  As always, thanks to every one of you who take the time to look at our little blog and say a prayer for us!  This journey would be so much less rewarding without your words of encouragement and support!!

 

PS.  If you would like to donate to our adoption fund, there is a link to the right.  In addition, we have T-shirts & coffee for sale that we receive a portion of through some awesome companies!  Check out those links at the top!  We are thinking about putting together another fundraiser and will certainly post it here if we decide to!

We're approved!!!

As of May 28th, 2014, our Home-Study has been approved!  Yay!! This was a really big step and we're excited to have that part of the process completed. Now, here is how it goes...

In order for the agency to start showing our profile book (a book that we put together with pictures and info about us) to expectant birth moms, we need to either have the remaining $17,000 in hand or at least have an outline of where exactly the funds are coming from and how we could access the funds as soon as we receive a placement. We hope to get at least a portion of that (several thousand or more is hopeful!) from grants and the remaining will be from donations, fundraising and our personal savings.  Because we have chosen to set our preferences to adopt a girl, it could take us longer to receive a placement than families that are open to boy or girl so we're hoping we can start showing our profile book sooner than later so the wait can start. We've always had it on our hearts to adopt a girl (Abigail Grace) so we are going to remain steadfast on that even if it takes longer. It's pretty crazy because we could get a placement right after they start showing our profile book (not likely but has happened!) or a year or two later  (the average wait is around two years but the soonest has been about a week!) It's just a matter of how soon our story connects with a birth mom who is expecting a girl. 

So...please continue to pray for the birth parents, our future daughter, the agency and us. As always, the support of everyone has meant (and continues to mean) so much!

Praying for blessings for all of you!!

Home-Study Visits Completed!

We're so excited that as of two weeks ago (April 25, 2014) we completed our last Home-Study Visit!!!  Even though this is a long detailed part of the process, it wasn't bad at all. We actually kind of enjoyed it!  The visits consisted of individual interviews with each of us, interviews as a couple, a home environment check visit, and a visit to discuss what we are open to/our preferences.

Now, we will be getting our official approval letter anytime and it will be time for us to raise more funds by applying for grants & fundraising. Then, once we know where the remaining funds are coming from, we will make our profile book (a book that has pictures and tells all about us for the birth mom to look through) and birth moms will start looking at it until one picks us to adopt her baby girl!  Crazy awesome!! It's becoming more real now that the Home-Study is done and we have come this far! We knew it would happen but it starts to become more of a reality in our mind as another part of the process is completed. Now, we're pretty much left with one big task- coming up with the rest of the funds needed to be able to have our profile book shown. We appreciate your prayers as we start looking into more fundraising options & grants. Thanks so much for the support!

If you would like to help us in our journey, there are a couple of ways...

1) As mentioned, pray!  Pray for us, the birth parents, Abigail, Bethany Christian Services and everyone involved.

2) Financial support. If you desire to help financially, donations to Abigail's adoption fund can be made directly on this site via paypal or mailed to PO Box 8334 Richmond, VA 23226.

Thank you all & God Bless!

Heather & Benson

Home-Study Visit #1!

We had our first home-study visit yesterday from 6-8pm. It was a breeze :) Katherine just came over and sat in our sun-room and talked with us for a couple hours. We went over paperwork and she asked us a little about ourselves.

We know God has this all figured out so we're actually very relaxed about the whole process so we weren't nervous at all. It looks like the home-study is going to happen pretty quickly because we already have our 2nd visit scheduled for next week which will be in their office and will consist of individual meetings with us.

The 3rd visit will be back at our home and will mostly involve going over a home environment checklist to make sure we're baby ready and the last visit is back in their office to go over our preferences and look at some other profile books so we can get ours together! The whole home-study process is only these 4 meetings so we'll probably have those completed by mid April!  It's definitely moving along now!  Thanks again for the prayers!!